A Mother's Hope

Back and forth, back and forth, back and forth.  I quietly rocked miss Piglet in her dimly lit bedroom.  Quiet lullabies were playing on my Droid as we rocked and I prayed.  It is a scene that Piglet and I repeat every night, it is our going to sleep routine (works pretty well on Mommy!)

Quietly sucking on her binkie, wrapped up in her blankie miss Piglet began to nod off and drift away to dreamland.  Another day was finished and it was time to rest up for tomorrow.  I love our night time go to bed routine.  It is the quiet part of the day where it is just Mommy and Evie alone, cuddling and talking to Jesus together.  My heart is excited for the nights in the future when Piglet says her prayers at night.

That is my biggest prayer for my daughter.  When I am being honest, I don't really care if she likes the Packers, Redskins, or even the Cowboys, or if she decides she doesn't like football at all.  I will support her if she chooses something more feminine over sports.  If she is the valedictorian, or an average grade student, if she is a chef, dancer, accountant, teacher, doctor, or author, it will not matter.  The one thing that matters the most to me is that she will spend her life following God, that she will be a woman after His own heart.

I have a second prayer that is also important, and that is that God will protect her from the pain of rape.  Having been raped I know that it is survivable, that you can live joyfully after rape.  Rape is not the romanticized "fate worse than death", but it is something that I pray Piglet will never have to endure.  Even now, 10 years later I still deal with repercussions, and I don't want that for my beloved daughter.

For now I know that those worries are future things.  Right now it is time to enjoy having a cuddle bug, to soak up the smiles, the giggles and the arms outstretched waiting to be picked up and held.  All too soon she will be grown up.

-JLP-